This blog does not have the usual positive reinforcements. Today, my blog is about love. The way love is in its different forms around us. The way love molds and remolds us until we become something different than who we were before the love happened to us. That change may be for better or for worse, that judgement reserves with time alone. But “Love Conquers all” is a phrase well known and vouched for.
When we think of love, we feel all warm and mushy inside. The picture of a meadow with birds flying and chirping around, maybe a rainbow, lots of trees and the sun shining with lots of clouds in the sky, and you are there in the middle of it all with the object of your love – that may be your lover, your child, your pet, your parent, your friend, your sibling, or maybe your book or music or even laptop (although in my imagination, there is no Wi-Fi tower nearby so you might leave the laptop at home and come). Love brings a nice feeling to teenagers and youth. It also brings a frown on middle aged people and old people when youth talks of it. For them, love is holding hands with your partner and watching the kids grow to be wonderful people, playing with the grand-children, growing old together. The conclusion remains that talking of love brings about various images in people’s head which eventually makes them smile.
“Love is blind” it is said. But does anyone know why it is said so? The reason for this is that when we are in love, we do not see the flaws of the person we are in love with. This does not necessarily mean the romantic love between lovers. It also includes the parental love or love between siblings or friends or any other relationship you can think of. There are some examples of love and the change that it brings along that I will keep on adding as I progress. They are much generalised examples but I am sure you will be able to relate to them at some levels. Most of the times, love makes a better person of us. We not only ignore the flaws of the person we love, we try to develop ourselves to become a better person for the person we love. The same holds true even when it comes to our pets. Having a pet in a household, research proves, makes the family members to be more loving, understanding and patient. Love helps us evolve into people we never we would be capable of becoming.
The love between the mother and her child is said to be the purest of them all (although today it may not be 100% true but let us assume it for the time being to be true). The child may be very naughty or a very dangerous person but for the mother, the child is always innocent and never at fault. On a flip side, for a child who loves its mother a lot, even if the mother is a drug addict, for the child, the mother is its world and therefore is blind to her faults. If you take an example of a pet, even if you adopt a stray dog and love him enough, he will be very loyal and faithful to you. OK, forget a dog, you love a lion and it will love you back. You love the most fearsome animal on the planet and give me one instance in the whole of eternity where the animal has not loved the person back. You will not be able to, because that has, can and never will happen. Heck, even plants respond to love, as proved by Dr. Bose. Love does change all, and love turns a blind eye to your faults, no matter what they are. In an ideal world, love is the most beautiful thing possible for any living thing. Everyone and everything would be perfect and deserving of love and everyone will be happy.
We relate love to being all about happiness. We say we should spread love everywhere and all the problems around us will be solved. We feel that the issues happening around us are because of lack of love. Now, here I am turning the tables and going over to the other side. Unfortunately, love is not only about giving. Sometimes it is about receiving and at times about snatching what you love.
Open today’s newspaper. Read any of the articles given in any of the page there, and tell me one article which does not have a form of love hidden in it. The concept that by spreading love, the problems will be solved, is completely wrong. Love is already there everywhere. It is just that the love which is currently omnipresent is not the love we have in mind when we say the above things. Let me give you some generalised examples on how today’s headlines has love in it.
If the headlines are about politics, it is for the love of power and position. If it is about sports, it is love of fame and money, the same applies to entertainment industry. If it is about a murder or any similar incident, there will be some obsessive love involved somewhere, be it for oneself or for a partner who cheated or anything like that. In the science and technology section, you will find news about people who are absolutely in love with what they do and therefore creating magnificent breakthrough in their respective fields. It may also be about the love of fame and money, but let us give the scientists a benefit of doubt and say they are working tirelessly for the betterment of the world we live in. Matrimonial section, naturally, screams of love in all directions in the form we are used to associating love for. Advertisements showcase the love for comfort which has developed recently. You see any article, any bit of sentence and there will be some form of love in there somewhere. Love is indeed there everywhere, and unfortunately, it also happens to be the root cause of the newspaper articles being published today.
As said earlier, love changes you. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that the change is for good. Love makes you do strangest of things to earn the approval of the one you love (sometimes the one you love may be yourself too, which is also called Ego). Sometimes they are good things. You want to get rid of your bad habits or flaws for the person you love. You want that person to love you more so you become a really nice person. Sometimes, though, it may be bad. There are many instances of killings for love, or acid attack or other similar monstrosities. Love makes you blind to the side effects of the things you do. You feel you are doing it so you will get the approval of the other person and that makes it right. It may not be so all the time.
The flip side to change happens when it is one sided love. Now again this does not necessarily mean romantic relationships. For a child who thinks his/her parents will only love them if they get into a specific course or get a particular percentage in exams or something similar, will let go of what really makes them happy and work extra hard to achieve what the parents want. Look around you. There are many such people who are in fields they hate but are continuing only because they want to make someone happy. Then there is peer pressure. Why does that happen again? The need to impress the people around you, and to impress means to make them love you. So again love plays a major role in peer pressure, which is another form of one sided love. Look around you in the office, you will find many people who are sucking up to their bosses. The love of money, power or position, in a one sided way, is again visible.
Love sometimes brings about an obsession for the thing, animal or person you love. The deeper the love, the intense would be the obsession. The way a parent obsesses over their child interpreting it as protection but sometimes, rendering them incapable of emotional growth, the way a lover obsesses over the partner, rendering a suffocation in the relationship, obsession for power in work creates politics, and many such examples. Anyway, obsession begins as a need to protect (either the person you love or yourself) but ends up stunting the other people’s growth in various aspects of life.
Even Shakespeare, the creator of Love in literature, has written about various forms of love and not only the romantic love. All the other emotions like hatred, jealousy, greed, contempt, sadness, grief, pain, sorry, exhalation, happiness, joy, pride, ego, and everything you can think of comes from the base emotion of love. Love is the base of them all. Love is an emotion which is common to all the things with life in it. Love is something which can create and destruct.
You know, I feel there are a lot of destructive things which are used in wars like nuclear bombs, atom bombs and what not. But the most fearsome weapon that man has is love, and the strangest thing is that it can be used either way. Love can bring extreme happiness and tremendous sorrow depending on how it is being used. In spite of that, Love is the best weapon in anything. No matter what situation you are in, you can change it by love. No matter who you meet or come across, you can bring them to your side by love. No matter how fearsome an animal comes in front of you, you can remain safe by using love (or maybe by running away too, depending on the distance between the animal and you). Just because it has all the negative aspects to it doesn’t mean we shouldn’t still like the concept of love and falling in love.
Love most definitely is still a very romantic feeling. Love still exists everywhere, and it can never be honestly said that the world would be a better place with only goodness around. A balance is always a must and that is what, I guess, love does today – creating a balance between good and evil.
Do read and comment. Suggestions on improvements are always welcome :):):):)