It feels so nice to be back on blogging. My busy schedule gives so much less time to pursue my passion. But corporate world has its own mystic addictions and attractions, which makes me postpone my passion for a while. Right now, I am enjoying my life in every possible way.
But now that I am writing, I should focus on one love at a time. Otherwise my words will get upset with me. Jokes apart, today the topic I am thinking about is love. It has come by public demand. After reading my blogs, many of my friends asked me to write about love. Their reason being they want to know my thoughts about it. For a long time, I was putting the thought away and focusing on way of thinking and positivity. But there is only so far you can run from your own thoughts and being a human being, love is one of the many thoughts in my mind. So I decided to adhere to my friends’ wish and pen down my thoughts on this “issue”.
Yes, love is an issue, one of the major issues facing the mankind. Falling in love is a universal condition. No one, rich or poor, powerful or weak, brilliant or stupid, is averse from this situation. It has a unique characteristic of making the person feel tremendous pain but having them enjoy the pain too.
It is one of the purest feeling in this world but these days, one of the most misused too. Love is also one of the most misunderstood feeling among mankind. People have definite idea of how it feels to be in pain, joy, sorrow, happiness, etc. But no one knows for sure how it feels to be in true love. It is always an assumption.
Love, in reality, is the most beautiful feeling. It is defined by the feeling of contentment. You understand you are in love when you feel content in life. But love doesn’t necessarily happen only with a lover. Love can be felt in so many different ways and still be pure. The most honest form of love is that which is there between a mother and a child. Love also exists between siblings, cousins, friends, relatives, pets, even possessions. All these forms of love are very important in our lives. These feelings makes us who we are and help to foster relationship in the society. However the most common form of love is the most sought out for: true love. Here I shall be focusing on only that one kind.
There are all kinds of fairy tales about true love being extremely romantic and being something to die for. All the childhood tales tell you how the Prince and the Princess ride together into the sunset. This idea makes almost all the girls and some boys believe that true love is exactly like a fairy tale. Even I believed in that until some time ago. But lately I came to realise the beautiful truth about love. And when my friends pestered me about this topic, I decided to share my observations with you all.
Love is truly a fairy tale. The only difference is that it is not handed to you as one, you have to make it a fairy tale. And when you do manage to make a fairy tale out of your love life, you will experience everything you had always read in those fairy tales.
Another myth is that your soul mate will complete you. No one else can complete you, that is entirely up to you. But being in love with someone makes you aware of your shortcomings and makes you appreciate the process of filling it up and developing yourself as a person, both for yourself and for your beloved.
People spend their lives searching for that perfect person to fall in love with. And when they don’t find a perfect person, they declare that there is no such thing as true love and settle for whatever they find next. This is a mistake even I committed. But thankfully I did not reach the final stage of settling blindly. There is no such thing as a perfect person. You do not fall in love with someone because they are perfect. It is because you have fallen in love with them that they are perfect.
The best litmus test to know if you are in the right relationship is to check how you are feeling everyday. If everyday makes you feel happy about everything in this world, then you are definitely in the right relationship. Here I do not mean happy like a fool. Everyone has issues in their lives and it is not possible to be happy all the time. But when you are with someone, you don’t feel alone in all these issues. You always have someone to talk to, to share with, in some way or the other. The person will be there to comfort you in your issues. That feeling is what drives you in life – the feeling of partnership.
Love develops you in ways even you can’t imagine. Love changes you in unbelievable ways. When you fall in love, with the right and not the perfect person, you become a different person. There comes a force within you which is hard to ignore. There is a pull within you which is new and exciting.
Yes, the proverbial click of true love exists. But please don’t go about trying to hear the actual clicking sound. Unlike what is believed about the click, it is more of a feeling than an actual sound. Sometimes that feeling comes instantly, and at times it comes at a later stage of knowing someone. But just because the click took time to happen doesn’t mean it isn’t real. The most beautiful love stories are those that start between best friends.
People commit a lot of mistakes in the path of finding love. Many times those mistakes makes them feel disillusioned about the concept of love. But let me tell you, friends, love is as real as breathing. But it is like a butterfly – when you are chasing it, it will fly away from you. But when you settle down and get busy with something else, the butterfly will come searching for you. Don’t go in the search of love, let love find you. And trust me, it will be worth the wait. Always. Just because you failed some times in finding the right person, doesn’t mean you will never get. There is always a love story waiting for you. Let the story find you and then just watch history being rewritten through you.
Sharing your life with someone is the most beautiful experience in life. Knowing that the person accepts not only the good but also the bad things in you and still loves you, is a feeling that brings life to living. But this feeling doesn’t come free. Ask any couple who has been together for many years and you will know that there are as much valleys as there are hills on this path and you don’t get one without the other. Many people make the mistake of thinking that if there are any disagreements between partners then that means they are not meant to be together. But that is as incorrect as it goes. The people who remain together for long are those people who want to remain together. They have been through the hills and valleys of their path and still try to be together. They put in efforts into their relationship. They invest into their relationship and that’s why they are together.
Why do you think rose is the symbol of love? I am pretty sure it did not come without any reason. Have you ever properly observed a rose? Yes it has the pretty red flower at the top. But it also has a lot of thorns. To get to the rose, you have to get through the thorns first. The reason why a rose represents a relationship is because you don’t get a blossomed andsweet-smelling relationship without going through the thorns thrown in by time. But once you manoeuvre through the hardships and work to be together in spite of it all, you end up in possession of that beautiful red rose of your relationship. It won’t be easy at first but then what is life without a pinch of salt in it?
A male cousin of mine told me that guys understand very few words in love. Thankfully they understand “I love you” but according to my cousin, that’s all the words in their vocabulary. That again got me thinking. We, girls, are very vocal about our feelings. We love to express, especially when it is about love. And because of this tendency, sometimes we expect those feelings to be reciprocated vocally too. And when that doesn’t come, we feel bad or take it negatively.
However, we should understand that it is not the right thing to do. Expression by words are not the only form of expressing. Sometimes we should look beyond the number of ‘I love you”s said in a day and focus on how many times they have shown the care for us. We should accept the difference in means of communication. It will help brighten up our love life and make it more beautiful. Never forget that a clap happens only when two hands come together.
You can go on and on about love and it will never be enough. But there is one thing for sure. Unless you love yourself, you will never be able to find the true love. Bestowing the reason for your happiness in someone else is the most who erroneous thing you can do. Instead of trying to find someone to make you happy, try to find someone to share your happiness. There is a better chance of finding love that way.
Even after finding love, life will not be easier. But the fact that now you are not alone to face everything, makes it worth the efforts. Wait for the butterfly to find you. Once it does find you, wait for it to bloom into the beautiful, magnificent creature that it is. Have patience with love and you will be amazed at what it is capable of.
For anyone who expected this blog to be more romantic and lovey dovey, I am very sorry to let you down. However love is not a bed of roses. I cannot make you all believe that love is going to be a typical fairy tale. Love is understood on a micro level and not a macro level. Small moments in life define love. Those tiny moments may not be the magical fairy land way, but believe me when I say a cup of tea in the morning by your partner, when you are not feeling well, would contain so much more magic than having flowers bestowed upon you all your life. Life is made up of such small moments and when these moments are filled with love, you don’t require magical rainforest and cupids with arrows to make you believe in the magic of love. That magic just happens and filled up your life with joy of love.
Enjoy life the way it is meant to be. Accept love for the way it. Magic will happen in its own course and its own way, and sweep you off your feet. Knight in shining armour on a white horse are things of the past. If he comes like that today, you will run away from him thinking he is mad to wear such clothes and ride on a horse in today’s world. And when you do feel that click, do not ignore it. Fight for it. Do not let anything and anyone come in your way. Someday you will thank yourself for never backing off.
Be blessed with love always. Take care.